Monday, December 17, 2007


After a sumptuous Sunday late lunch, you come out of Grand Hyatt, a 5-star hotel and make yourself comfortable in the back seat of a big luxurious car and the car races towards some prestigious shopping places in the city. The other occupants of the car are determined to spoil you purely.

Oblivious of their plans, you are thinking of the Monday evening meeting. Suddenly you look something & ask for the car to be stopped. You step out and dash towards a person busy in his work. You tell him “four” and with a wide grin gesture the other three occupants of the car to join you.

They, with “Oh, she is never going to change” expressions come out smiling.

Sometimes a cutting chai in an open dhaba amidst chaotic noise gives you more pleasure than the diamond studs gifted to you half an hour back within the confines of a hushed silence.

Current song- Love Me Do, You Know I Love You – Beatles
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Wednesday, December 12, 2007

The Packaged Deal

I can clearly see the two distinct you and I adore; adore but can not separate them. For me you are only one.… you as an arrogant, private individual and you as simple uncomplicated submissive passionate man.. the blessed one can get both of you together... so, separation should have been the most important criteria but it isn’t.

Au contraire, so plainly you distinguish two of me.. the innocent bubbly chulbuli me and private beautiful passionate me... a woman, a perfect companion. 10 on 10. Probably 12 on 10. And at times you miss only one of me. Yeah, I can understand it very well .. hows & whys.. everything.. but do you know something ? You can not get only one of me.. to have one, you have to have the other one.

It’s a packaged deal.

Current song- Yeh Mera Deewanapan Hai ya Mohabbat Ka Suroor Susheela Raman
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Monday, December 10, 2007


Today it is my sixth consecutive day of absence from work. It has become my habit to disappear suddenly without informing my considerate employers. All because of my alcoholic husband’s malicious habits. He is a daily wage worker, works at his whims and hammers me at his wishes.
I often wonder why my employers never thought about my being so accident prone. When enquired about my gouged eye or many blue black marks on my body I lie to them about the small accidents I meet with.

Oh, I forgot to introduce myself.

Hi, I am Sunaina. Thirty six years old, frail, weakly built and thoroughly thrashed, mother of two young girls. I work as a maid in nearby society flats to run the family. That is all for my initial introduction.

Right now I am feeling miserable and helpless. My husband has been missing since last four days. Normally at the end of the day he goes to that desi liquor shop in the nook of PR road and comes back heavily drunk at around midnight. Being an old customer to that shop and an acquaintance of the shopkeeper, he gets the hooch on credit and sometimes a place to sleep over in the shop itself.

My husband is a simple uneducated man. Responsible or not, till date I am not able to figure out. He has taken a life insurance policy of Rs 1 lakh for my gloomy days and always dreamt of a small house of our own. He had taken care of me when after the second childbirth my condition had got deteriorated and there was very little hope of my survival. He also helps me by dropping children to school.

After a family dispute with his parents and younger brother over a one roomed chawl and us being thrown out of the only roof we had, it was an extremely tough time for both of us… At that time I was carrying his second child; his job & income were irregular and so I was forced to look for sundry jobs. Since then I have been working and he has been drinking.
And just now, the people who had gone to search for him have come back.. come back with the news of his death. His body was found near the railway tracks 2 Kms away. I am blank. I don’t know how to react. Slowly people have started pouring into my small tenement. I am still not been able to hear anything from my painful right ear which bore the brunt of his anger a week back. It is swollen and an odorous liquid is oozing out.
Now the usual stuff… praising the dead, mourning and contrived crying have taken over. The very close people (or the "family") have started to assess the profit & loss. Apparently they found out that profit rules over loss.
Two days have gone by; I am shifted to the same place from where I, along with my husband, was thrown out. Tomorrow we all leave for our native place to perform last rituals and also to decide the fate of me, my daughters and all my belongings/savings.
I am sitting in a corner in our native place where all the decisions are being taken by elders. Some decisions have to be taken now, just now. They can’t wait for the grief to subside.

Although in our caste, remarriage is allowed, they have decided that I will never remarry. To my utter surprise, my younger brother-in-law has willingly taken over the responsibilities and so all my belonging and savings are now his. Also, since I don’t have any son, the entire property (however small) including the chawl in the city will go to him.
We have come back to city again. It is almost two months now. The mourning is over. The money that came from my husband’s policy is with my brother-in-law. He needs it to buy an auto-rickshaw which in turn would help the increased daily expenses. After all, we three are dependent on him now in addition to his own family and the parents-in-laws.

I have taken their permission to join work to supplement the family income. All this time my employers have been kind and patient and have tried to help me in all respect.
I have rejoined work and I hand over all my earnings to my in-laws. Life is extremely difficult now, not that it was easier earlier. Now it includes doing more chores for a bigger family before I leave empty stomach for work and by the time I hit that mat in the corner, it is past midnight.
Off late, my daughters are falling sick very frequently. I can not take them to doctor as I neither have the time nor the money. The elder one has been pulled out of school as she has to help and look after younger kids at home. The other day she was not given food because she did not do so. I feel miserable. Is protesting a crime ?
No, this is not the life I had wanted. Good education for my daughters, full meals, our own roof on our head not a borrowed shelter, a good peaceful life and a caring father for my daughters... that was all I had longed for.

I want to live life.. for me and for my daughters. I am not going to givein. I will accept the offer of madam where I work, to open a bank account and will start saving. I’ll again enroll my daughter in school. I know my current partly emolument is not enough but I am determined to make my wish true.

I’ll do whatever I can.. to live life… my life.
The dawn has started. Time to get up.
And some decisions have to be taken now, just now.

Note:- Recently widowed Sunaina works as a maid in our house. Slightly different version of this story was published in this month's issue of Justfemme.

Current song- Katra Katra Milti Hai, Katra Katra Jeene Do – Asha Bhosale
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JustFemme, a women's e-magazine, perhaps the only one of its kind, was launched last month. The second issue has come out now.

The only one of its kind ?? Are MEN allowed ?? Yes, why not, but only in the comments section. ;)

Do check it out! And while you are there, look for my write-ups too :)

First one is about a woman Sunaina. As always, based on real facts, I think the story is 98% true. It would have become more detailed and insightful had there not been any restriction for no. of words. Come back after reading and I'll tell more about her or do you want the story here on this blog ?
My second article is .. hmmm.. go and read it. :)

Feedbacks are welcome.

Current song- Aaj Main Upar, Aasman Neeche – Kavitha Krishnamurthy
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Friday, December 07, 2007

Copyright Violation - Part II

Update on my yesterday’s post.

Folks, when I was told about this theft, I had gone to Nishant Paul’s (oh, he has become so famous now) site and had checked. The poems were shown as his own creations. Now, after so much of nice words being told about him and all his friends being informed (they are as much shocked as we are); Mr Smarty is trying to act innocent naïve.
It seems he has deleted those posts now. I haven’t checked but I believe Ashes has done so.

Before deleting he sat on my blog yesterday for two hours, checked some 20-30 posts, checked Sam’s post also and then wrote a mail to one of my blogger friends. Have a look.

Dear XXXX,
Even though u could c there in those poems that I hvnt mentioned my name there. This is purely creative work of Cuckoo, and I hv nothing to do by this. I'm my self a lawyer and I do know the violation of Copyright Act. The two hindi Poems I hv posted is absolutely Coockoo's and and I did posted as it is. Believe me somebody edited these and changed little bit. Plz. if u have time then read my other posts and my name is there. Much to say I do not know hindi typing then how could I amend these. Now and here I'm going to delete these from my blog. I do tender my unconditional apology as I do not wish walk with all this shit.

With regards,

Now, some of his friends have also commented on my previous post. One of them a certain Khan says “But I don’t know whether he writes his own poem or copy any other's poem. He claims to have creating his own poems.”. Read his full comment in comment section.

Please note the above sentences in bold.. Nishant says Someone else has edited those words after he posted the poems. Ha Ha Ha...

Mr Paul, what do you think of all of us here, eh ?? Absolute idiots ??

And please if you don’t know Hindi typing then what about so many other Hindi poems on your blog ? Have they been lifted too ??

Current Song:- Shehron ki Galiyon Mein Jab Andhera Hota Hai – Asha
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Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Copyright ? Plagiarism ? What is that ?

Note:- As suggested by some of you, the links to his blog are removed from this post.

Guess what ? My deary lovely poems are being hijacked ! Last week, one of my readers gave me a big jolt. No, he is not the culprit. :-)

Giving me some links he informed about one Nishant Paul who has been publishing my poems on his blog and accepting, accumulating appreciations as well !!

Whoaaaa !! What an idea sir ji !!

He has lifted my poems, sometimes along with the pictures, changed the gender/ tense and published it.

Please see yourself the original and the copied version here. The picture used in his poem has been lifted from my other poem. Though I don’t own a copyright on that photo but then who doesn’t like readymade stuff ?

Again, the original poem and the hijacked version here.

Even the photo of this post has been copied here.

Mr Paul, whoever you are, I am stunned to see your audacity. Have you ever heard of copyright violation ?? Please check my right sidebar. Don’t you feel ashamed of accepting those nice words of appreciation when people praise you for the lines which are NOT written by you ??

I don’t have any idea how many of my creations have been kidnapped, mangled and molested before being presented to this world as someone else’s bride. I implore you to visit his blog and drop him a line.

I doubt if the other poems on his blog are his own or copied from some other blogs.

All my poems are very close to my heart and my heart aches to see them in this state. Only consolation .. they are good enough to be worth copying. :-)

Current Song:- Lift Kara De – Adnan Sami

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Sunday, December 02, 2007


The imperfect me... the perfect you
Nervous me.. Patient you
Calm me... impatient you
Humble me .. Arrogant you
Serene me .. Asshole you
Listener me.. Chatterbox you
Mother me .. Child you
Little girl me.. Grandpa you
Protector me .. insecure you
Mellow me .. Gentle you
Beautiful me.. Lovable you
Ziddi main .. Ziddi tum..
Sharaab main .. Nasha bhi main ;)

Sometimes it requires more than a couple to make a couple.

Current song- Chupke Se Raat Ki Chaadar Tale – Sadhna Sargam

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