तुम अनछुई सी
तुम अनछुई, एक कुल्हड़ जैसी
जो एक बार होठों से छुए जाने पर,
किसी से चूमे जाने के बाद,
आख़िरी सांस तक बस उसी की हो चली ।
और वो मेम, चीनी मिट्टी के कप जैसी
जो एक के होठों से लगने के बाद,
फिर एक बार धुलकर, सजकर है तैयार
किसी और के आगोश में जाने को।
As always, translation doesn’t convey the same meaning but it is some consolation for non-Hindi readers.
You a virgin, like an earthen pot.
Who after being kissed
and touched by someone,
don’t let anyone else claim you till your end.
She, like a cup of china clay
enjoys the intimacy with one.
And is ready again after a wash & a makeup
to embrace yet another one.
Current song- Aaja Re Aa Zara – Md Rafi
69 comments:
lovely!!
It's beautiful.
Liked the Hindi version. :)
Happy to see that you only took a few days "off"!
... and thanks for the immediate and spontaneous translation this time!
Shall I understand that the fidelity by Hindi women is doubtful?
subhaan allah
janab bahut mast likha hai aapne
quite a nice one.... though am simply wondering what made you write this??
आपने सच कहा कि अनुवाद मूल नहीं हो सकता।
मुझे इस पंक्ति, 'और वो मेम, चीनी मिट्टी के कप जैसी' का यह अनुवाद, 'She, like a cup of china clay'ठीक नहीं लगता। दोनो के अर्थ भिन्न लगते हैं। पढ़ने से मुझे लगा कि पहले छन्द की महिला और दूसरे छन्द की महिला अलग अलग हैं। शायद यह ठीक होता, 'And that ... like a cup of china clay.
ऐसे आपने लिखा अच्छा है। हिन्दी में और क्यों नहीं लिखते।
Beautiful! It has been atleast 5-6 years since i read sumthing in devnagri. Thot wud a almost forgotten it. Had sum trouble readin it but understood it! Seems like u nd me exprcing same problems with translations! lolz.
Really beautiful piece of wrk!!
Bahut khub kavita hai. Yehi hai zindegi ke bandishe, lekin pehla wala milna bahut mushkil hai. Kuch Khush nashibo koi milta hai!
soooo ur virgin?
thanks cuckoo-chan for lovely song!!
PM,
Thank you.
Sunil,
Thank you. Yes, Hindi version is original so it has to be. :)
Peter,
Well, when I posted last, I was in the middle of two trips.
Oh thank you but as I said translations are never the same.
Shall I understand that the fidelity by Hindi women is doubtful?. What made you think like that ? I might be talking about women of your country. ;)
Ansaari,
Oh, so you have stuck to this name forever ?
Shukriya aapka. Aate rahiye. Lutf uthaate rahiye. :)
Sam,
Thank you. Ohh now you don’t wonder about it. :))
Btw, till now each of my poems is inspired by some people around me in real life.
Unmukt,
Welcome to my blog. I wonder where from you tumbled here. :)
Thank you for liking the poem. Haan, anuvaad mool nahi ho sakta kabhi bhi. Sorry for using the English script for writing Hindi. I am in a hurry.
Well, about the two paras of the poem...you guessed it right. They are about two different women.
Thanks once again. Main Hindi mein likhti hu lekin samay ki paabandi hai. Agar aapko meri kavitaayen padhna hai to yahan dekhen.
Btw, I write on another blog as well. You’ll get all the info if you spend two minutes on the main page of this blog.
Thanks for your visit. Will look forward to more of your visits. Keep coming.
Beast,
Welcome again. Looks like you are going to be a regular here. :)
Thank you. Even I have difficulty in writing devnagri. :P
And Translations ? Ohh that’s a tedious job. Never gives the same meaning as originals. And I hate translating my own work.
Thanks once again for liking it. I started writing in this form of expression only 4 months back. Here is the link if you want to read them.
Thanks for your visit. Keep coming.
Kalyan,
Welcome again.
Shukriya janaab. Arrey, aisa mat kahiye. Hamaare desh mein to abhi bhi milti hain pehle wali jaisi. :)
Btw, Can you easily read Hindi ?
Thanks once again. Keep coming.
Nikichan,
Now, I am wondering what kind of question is this.
Nice poem... and nice comparison.
Welcome back.
Fleiger,
Ohh I should welcome you here. :P How have you been ?
After a looooong time you are here and that too for a poem !! My poem must be really good.
And thank you. :)
Tradutore, traditore! That's the problem of the translations...
Loved to see your comments on the different Blogtrotter(s). Thanks!
I'll try to get to India one day...
Gil,
Oui, je suis d'accord avec vous.
Well, I visit all your blogs regularly, only sometimes I comment. :)
Yet to visit your very old posts.
Oh come to India, be our guest!
Very nice - i liked it as your best so far!!! Thanks for sharing it. :-)
Immersed in Romance :P ??
Amazing...
so true and deep..
:)
oh thats a LOVELY one Cuckoo(i mean another LOVELY poem ..ha ha)..
well this is cool..
तुम अनछुई, एक कुल्हड़ जैसी
जो एक बार होठों से छुए जाने पर,
किसी से चूमे जाने के बाद,
आख़िरी सांस तक बस उसी की हो चली ।
but y this:
फिर एक बार धुलकर, सजकर है तैयार
किसी और के आगोश में जाने को। ..
hum pakad ke rakhenge apne yaar ko..ha ha.its nice..hav a rock dy dear.
Quite intense and loved the exchange of words and shift -
loved the current song....!!
Ranjeet,
Thank you. It was just a thought lingering on, tried to put it down. :)
Ajith,
Ohh me ? I am always in romance till death do … ;) I am a die hard romantic person.
Mona,
Thank you.
Iceman,
:)))))))
Pankaj,
Thank you.
hum pakad ke rakhenge apne yaar ko.. Ha Ha… Lage raho. ;)
BTR,
Thank you very much.
Ohh the song ?? I love it very much and whoever got it from me, has loved it too !!
Do you listen to old songs as well ?
loved the kavita :) will keep coming here now!
Priyank,
Thank you and you are most welcome. :)
Wonderful work. My Hindi teacher would be impressed that I can read it still!
Cheers
David
David,
Ohh really ?
Thanks for coming. Keep visiting.
hmmm now that was thought provoking,my first reaction was how true have u written but on a closer look,i questioned myself if its true at all or r still indulging in appraising the delude.
I dont know.
A brilliant composition,keeps the fire in the mind burning.
So hws life?
Very deep and enchanting :)
You are very talented when it comes to writing and I agree translation sometimes can't reach the same level :)
Sorry couldn't catch up on your blog regularly, bz in moving to a new place. Will be here regular from july. Pls pardon my absence :)
Hugsssssssssssssss :)
Stay Beautiful...!!
Deepti,
The thought was lingering on for quite sometime. Have just come back from a trip. Yes, I know in today's scenario the things have changed but in general it is still the same.
Don't you think so ? Try to imagine with all the women of the country not only the metro ones. You'll get the answer. :)
And thanks for the appreciation. I mean it. Keep coming.
Sugarlips,
Thank you for all the appreciations. Ah ! They are just scribbles to be, miles to go before I call it a piece of writing.
Ohh moving ? To which place ? Shifting city or still in California ?
Aha! I have always liked short, crisp poems and this one is just that!
Good one, cuckoo!
Nice one..but u didnt translate the title? :)
I think Im a virgin..hehe...
Keshi.
nice one but bttr dont put it in english
after reading tht mazza kharaab ho jaata hai :)
Matka and virgin ??
still blinking !!!
Good to see you back again, welcome home. Thank you for the translation - lovely words, as ever!
Yeah I do....!!
Lazy,
Thank you very much. Ohh short ones ?? I'll keep it in mind. :)
Keshi,
Ohh my bad !! The literal translation of the title is “You untouched”.
Good that you know about your virginity. ;)
Desh,
Thank you. Yeah, I know translations are no good lekin jinko Hindi ka ek bhi akshar nahi aata unke liye to something is better than nothing.
And you don’t read the translation na.
Rauf,
Ufffffffffffff !!!!
What do I say now ?
Carol,
Sweet lady,
Thank you very much once again. Keep coming.
BTR,
Hmmm.. so you must be having a good collection ?? Who are your favourites if I may ask ?
Interesting..!!!!
first two lines were enough for me... a thousand poems can't equal these... serene, blissful, sorry i don't need the rest, will flow in these two lines forever :)
btw, u r blogrolled ;)
love
Sid,
Is it so ? Did you like it or not ?
Adi,
Yeah, the start is quite good. I don't know how I could write so simple yet beautiful lines.
Sometimes it happens.. hai na ?
And thanks for blogrolling me. :)
Yeah, I can read hindi easily...aur pehle wali milte hain, lekin bahut mushkil se milte hain...Thanks very much & surely will return again:)
This one was pretty different - specially from the ones which you generally write - ones with romantic side to them..
i couldn't co relate to it.. but the idea and the thought put across is interesting...
the comparisons made (the virginity of kulhad and the external beauty but inherent brittleness of chini mitti ka cup) were pretty amazing..
Lovely lines .... wonderful similes .... great work!
bahut achi kavita hein...hehehe..is my hindi rite!! ;-P
Kalyan,
Oh Oh... aap abhi bhi 'bahut mushkil' pe atke hain ? I don't think so... look around you in your own country. Bahut mil jayengi pehle wali.
SiD,
Yeah, agree. This one is quite different from my previous ones.
This thought was lingering on for a few days since my trip. The poem has emerged from there it seems.
Sigma,
After a long time !!
Thank you for liking it. Even I didn't notice it'll come out this beautiful.
Mathew,
Thank you. Jeehaan, aapki Hindi bahut achi hai. :P
That's pretty intense, cuculus..
way to go!!
:))
Thanks for your comments to my comments! Such a pleasure to read all the comments here!
Hi Cuckoo,
In reply to the comment you left on the Weekly Blog Awards - yes, there was an error. One of the blogs was entered twice, hence the change.
Cheers
David
"And is ready again after a wash & a makeup to embrace yet another one."
True and bold. Careful with moral police. Actress Khushbu had problem for expressing the same , some time back.
Toothless,
Oh thank you very much. I wonder when you are going to have teeth. *rolling eyes*
Peter,
You are always welcome.
Such a pleasure to read all the comments here!... Oh yes, it indeed is ! Sometimes more than the posts I enjoy the comments section here when heavy discussions are part of it. ;)
David,
Hmmm.. I guessed so.
Thanks.
Bach,
Oh Thanks for reminding me !! I have so many such ‘bold & true’ things to write about. What do I do now ? ;)
Btw, she's a celebrity and I am a little birdie here.
Nice thoughts ...lyrics at one time were so poignant
Well written with nice words
Backpakker,
Thank you. Keep coming.
Pijush,
Thank you. :)
very nice poem and the picture! gr8!!
Abhijit,
Thank you. Appreciation for picture coming from you is like icing on the cake !
Lovely!!
GBU
Arti
Arti,
Welcome to my blog. Thanks for liking it. I never knew you could understand Hindi ! Or you read the translation ?
Keep coming.
ur ryt cuckoo....the transilation doesnt work out the same way...
innocently beautiful.. :)
sry 4 the delayd commnt......
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