Thursday, October 05, 2006

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – II

Whether you have read it or not, please read Part – I before reading this post for better continuity (or just for the heck of it ;)). I promise, I won’t proceed further till you finish. Waiting here for you.

Ok, done? Thanks. :))

So, the story goes like this. Once upon a time, there was a pretty little birdie named Cuckoo who shifted her nest to Mumbai..

Suddenly there was a tight slap on my face. “Oh come on, tell us the part II. Not interested in your boring story”.

Ouch!! Who did it? Huh? :((

Ok, so my self-made dictionary was swelling in size day by day. Some of these instances made me sit and think if I really was that bright? And as always, I was forced to have big bright grin on my face. I was learning new things. Yippeee…

But at other times I felt let down. Let down, because I FELT, by now some people had become aware of my knowledge of local vocab and at times they purposefully changed the conversation into their Hindi when they saw me coming their way. Just to have fun at my expense, I presume?? Grrrr..

This made me more quiet and observant all the time. I was almost tight-lipped. Though I wanted to shake the hand(s) of friendship offered by them, most of the time I ended up suspecting them for forming some conspiracies against me (purely my assumption). And so, a “Lady Jasoos” was born.

Once I even tried to tiptoe (with ears all up, eyes as sharp as an eagle) to their territory just to find out if they speak normally like that or only when they see me. But no luck :((

When I was new to my office, all my male colleagues were competing hard (of course, with all their good intentions), to impress me by helping in every little thing, even when I didn’t want any. How and what all they did over the period of time will NOT come in this post. Sorry.

Ok, let us come to the point.

On a particular day during break, some of them gathered around me, pulling each other’s leg in an attempt to have my full attention. One guy told me pointing to another “Ye bahut pakaata hai”.

“Oh, good. What all do you cook?” was my spontaneous question (with a big smile) to that other guy. There was a pin drop silence for 1.00000438 seconds and then to my utter surprise, everybody burst into non-stop laughter (literally ROFLing), so much so that some had tears in their eyes, and others, hot coffee on their clothes and all over the carpet. Now what??? Was there any hidden joke? I was utterly confused.

Enough is enough !! I am NOT (in CAPS, Bold, Underlined & bigger font size) going to open my mouth till I am dead sure of the meaning, I pledged to myself. These stooopid guys, what do they think of themselves?? Huh? Why do they do this to me?

I was terribly disturbed, always in deep thoughts, juggling with new wordology.

On another day, I overheard someone talking about potholes and suddenly changing to Hindi “Main udi maarke aaya”. Urghhh!! Another challenge?? Do these guys do it purposely, to check the depth my knowledge? Why do they have to speak near me? Did I see him slyly looking at me from the corner of his eye and smiling? The Lady Jasoos had full doubts about his intentions.

To be continued….

Current song- Dream Girl, kisi Shayar ki Ghazal.. Dream Girl – Kishore

38 comments:

Ketan said...

noooo, its just part of our day2day vocab, i guess. 'Pakaana' is pretty famous, we used it when describing some of our teachers ;). 'udi' i dont know.

Ketan said...

and BTW, the url for part-I doesn't work. >|<

Anonymous said...

Ha Ha Hilarious.. very funny.
Hey Lady Jasoos..why are you keeping the suspense? Don’t do this to us pls. Don't make us wait.
1.00000438 seconds – you counted the seconds? ;) HAHAHAHA
and that NOT..bold caps etc.. just too good man

So, you were total novice when you came to mumbai?

Hazel Dream said...

first ..Plzzzz remove this
[if !supportEmptyParas][endif]

because for a mkt man like me this technologial jargon is like mumbaia hindi .
secondly .. where do u work ?? is it Mumbai tapoori association or what ??

SiD said...

ultimaaaaaaaaaatee....
I am still smiling!!!
The start was awesome.. with that slapping and all.. and the humour was very well maintianed in the whole post... really good one..

I know pakaata.. but for the benefit of non mumbaites meaning of 'udi maarna'..

and Lady Jasoos.. hahahaha.... so the name has stuck !!!!...

Anonymous said...

LJ in full flow again, well done...

That "pakata" joke was too good (assuming it was a joke ;)). Think what you would have done if he had said, "pakau"

And told you, you need deep knowledge of marathindi (that's marath+hindi) if you want to survive in mumbai. No pure hindi for us, LJ...

And here goes my shameless plug, which I missed last time. Here are some similar experiences I had. Now read it.

Anonymous said...

And when is that "How and what all they did over the period of time" post coming up then?

Cuckoo said...

Ketan,
'Pakaana' is famous in western India, not all over (in north they still say, kya bore karta hai). Please try to see from a person's pt of view who has never been to this part of India before.

I think SiD will agree with me on this. Right SiD?

Now most of us know this word, credit goes to "Munnabhai" or Govinda movies. Also, we should not forget the contributions of our friends from west India who go to different parts and spread such 'knowledge'. :))

'Udi'?? Wait for next & final part.

Mayank,
Thanks again. You like all my posts? Why don't you start your own blog?? Let me also laugh sometimes. :))
Yes, I was 'Raw' when I came here. Now I am cooked (paki hui) ;)

Hazel Dream,
I think you are using IE (Internet Explorer). Ignore that error.
Yes, you got it right! I live in a slum & work for a tapoori association. Any more queries?

SiD,
Are you still smiling? :)) Tahe-dil se Shukriya. But being a serious person, I really think I am very bad at humour department. Hor, Likhna to aanda hi nahi mainoo..kee karaan?
Lady Jasoos?? I had to include her. :D After all, it made me laugh when I got that name :) My only worry - it should not stick with me.

Request you to go thru my reply to Ketan. I need you there.

Fleiger,
You liked the post. Thanks. Mee aabhari aahe. But I still have doubts. Very poor in tickling the phunny bone. Remember that 'koi padhega to kya bolega?' ;)
Hey, don't have to praise if I am not good. OK?

Now, you don't call me LJ :D

Saw that link & left a comment as well. Yet to go thru all your posts. Why do you write so much? :P

Cuckoo said...

Fleiger,
And when is that "How and what all they did over the period of time" post coming up then? .. Never :P

Anonymous said...

Changle ahe... mulila marathi pan yete ;)

Hey, don't have to praise if I am not good. OK?
Koi padhega to kya kahega? :D
Anyways, I will never write anything which I do not agree with, unless it is followed by *evil laugh* (I should get a patent on that I guess). For future ref... ;)

And why never? Guys falling over each other to help a young cute girl.. now that's the stuff comedies are made up of. And we all like to laugh when we are not the point of the joke.

Was going to tell the meaning of "udi". Lucky I didn't...

Looks like shameless plug works. Should do it more often now.

And my dear LJ, that term has already stuck... *evil laugh with demon laughing graphics from mythological serials*

Anonymous said...

wonderful post!! Very funny. Laughing non-stop.
I again say you have a unique way of writing in plain simple colloquial english. A person always feels like he/she is experiencing it.

Humour was well maintained thruout the post and it was good humour not the cheap one. :D
So, little birdie got a slap? ;)

Nice to read such posts. Keep it up.

Anonymous said...

Hahahahah...that was too good...i can't stop laughing...:)
It was a Zhakaas post...Oops!!! :)

SiD said...

by gawd.... tusssi tan punjabi vi shuru ho gaye... bot vadiya...:):)
and ma'am - u r under estimating urself by saying u r nt good at writing..

regd the general knowledge abt these words to people not from that part of the country..

well yes.. i agree that they have been made famous by the govinda movies..
And these terms do sound familiar... but the exact meaning.. many a times we dont know..
we do use pakkana... but udi maarna and all - may have heard sometime somewhere... but definitely not in the vocab

Hazel Dream said...

is that your anger miss?? .. I didnt mean to offend you .. i was just trying to continue the light humour ..Hmm I think Mars and venus have different language ..

Mridula said...

LJ, this is a good one, read the first part too. From your blog, I would not have thought of you as an introvert girl!

SiD said...

hahahah.... i am telling you LJ, the name has stuck!!!
and yes.. if some one not knowing you comes here... no way he can predict that u r an introvert person!!

Cuckoo said...

Fleiger,
Good that you didn’t tell the meaning of ‘udi’. Maybe after my next post, I’ll request you to tell me some of the meanings, which I am still struggling with.
LJ ?? ha ha .. You two brats made me LJ. :D

Priyam,
Thanks for appreciating me. It was my first attempt to make it slightly funny after that serious post. Yeah, I don’t believe in cheap comedy.
And I write what I speak generally. Can’t write the words like “haraamzada” “behen ***” “fu**” etc which would not be mine. I never use such words in my real life, so can’t even imagine myself using them just for the sake of making my post funny.

Sunil,
Thanks. Take a break from your laugh,, some more is coming in next post. ;)

Sid,
tusssi tan punjabi vi shuru ho gaye... aaho ji.. kee karaan, tussi dasso? Phul jawa punjabi? Hey, I am to learn new things in life but not at the cost of forgetting the old ones. :)
Wait for my next post. Do you want me to give actual meanings of the words used in these posts? Just tossing with the idea to give all the words in the end. Then maybe Fleiger can correct if I am wrong somewhere.

Hazel Dream,
No, that’s not my anger. My anger is much more strong & straight fwd. :) Of course, Mars & Venus have different language!! So, don’t worry, be happy. :)

Through these posts I was trying to illustrate the difficulties faced by a person who’s new to this part of India with no prior knowledge of local vocab. And the words that I am referring to, are used on day-to-day basis by ALL including educated community. As far as my understanding goes, it’s not a tapori language b’coz these educated ppl use only select few words in their entire sentence not the sentence itself.
The tapori lingo is something like this “Apun ko lafda karne ka ich nahi, kya?”
Someone from western India, pls clarify.

Mridula,
First, I must thank you to come here. How I was longing to get a comment from a female!! These guys were bothering me a lot :P ;) Thank you very much. :D
Oh my God, you too started LJ??

SiD & Mridula,
That’s a real compliment if I don’t look like an introvert!! I am flattered. Now, I can say that my writing was a success. What more can one ask for if one is able to depict something, which he/she is not?
LJ, LJ all the way LJ. Thanks again. :)

Anonymous said...

brats? Brats?? BRATS??? As much as it paine me to disagree with a lady, I would rather not be called a brat...

Cuckoo said...

ok, ok. I am sorry. I didn't mean any offenses. I'll remove that.

Anonymous said...

That's the second time I have spooked you, LJ ;)
Anyways, the name is now stuck. Maybe we can call you LJC (or LJCC?)
Just chill, chill, just chill... (and you are responsible for putting that song in my head today)
So, when is the next part coming? Looking forward to the Glossary at the end. But you are doing pretty good job till now.

Cuckoo said...

Puleeeeease no LJCC etc.. You are increasing the length day by day. ok, LJ will do. :(

But you are doing pretty good job till now.Thank you. :D Cuckoo khush hui ;)

Hey I wanted you to go thru my replies to all the ppl. Somewhere I have requested you to comment.. I think my replies to SiD & Hazel D.

SiD said...

Ok.. now its official that u r LJ...
so can we expect the blog's name to be changed from Cuckoo's nest to.. LJ's Den

and ya.. u r the 1st person in 24 years who has called me a brat ...
and punjabi: kindly reveal the mysteries..LJ..how come u know punjabi..seems like the mumbai ki chokri was once a dilli ki kudi..

Cuckoo said...

Ok, LJ speaking now. :)

u r the 1st person in 24 years who has called me a brat ... Well, there is always a first time. ;)
Waise, by 'brat' I meant 'natkhat bachcha'

oyee, aapki punjabi vich galti.. it's 'dilli di kudi' not 'dilli ki kudi'. And let the mysteries be mysteries. :))

Hazel Dream said...

hmm the problem is that first I am also new to Mumbai ( just an year old) and I work for an industry where most of the ppl are at their artificial snobish best and hence i dont get to listen such interesting words .
but yes my Bai is the one which uses this language .. May be i will learn with you ...

Anonymous said...

Hmmm....part II ends and we are agog awaits the III part....lol..." I think I can wait till we get the " glossary" in the end...I would like to read the 3 post once again for another good laugh....!
Atta girl...good going...!
Tk care and have a nice weekend.

Cuckoo said...

Hazel Dream,
Ohh then you will definitely enjoy my posts b'coz I am going to write more & more about amchi Mumbai !!
So, keep visiting. :))

Bendtherulz,
Heyy many thanks. There are so much of it that I can go till 5-6 parts very easily but don't want to drag it. :))
Keep visiting, keep laughing, keep crying as well ;)

SiD said...

OMG... dilli 'di' kuddi ne punajbi vich galtiyan vi kadni shuru karti...
impressive..
new punjbi movie to be launched -
LJ diyan Mysterian!!! tain ta tainnnn...

Anonymous said...

@Sid: "LJ diyan Mysterian"... too good...

@Cuckoo: The name is forever stuck now. It can change, but for that you will need a better name than this. So chill ;)
And about bambaiyya hindi, it is an odd combination of marathi + hindi, which is mainly spoken by uneducated class. Educated people are normally speaking more of hinglish now-a-days. But some words like lafda which you will recollect from Munnabhai and govinda movies are even now part of any mumbaikar's mothertongue.
And that's why I told you that Mumbaikars cannot speak marathi ;)

Cuckoo said...

SiD,
Haanji.

Fleiger,
You mean in office they don't use these words at all? I heard them in office from local guys, not always though. These are the words I picked up because I was & am curious to know abt them.

Anonymous said...

No, as I said, these words are part of everyday vocab. And since munnabhai and other movies, more so. And if they are aware of how you search for the words....
And who is going to play you in movie? Another "punjab ki kudi"?

Cuckoo said...

Fleiger,
Ok. And that haanji was for SiD's first sentence. :D For rest of his comments, let him decide.. he can take help from you. :P
SiD,
I liked your background music "tain ta tainnnn...". :D

Anonymous said...

Samajh gaya ji... ;)

SiD said...

what say fleiger... how abt u being the director...???
regd hero... i was thinking abt.... umm.. u know... i have some aspirations ...
and I wont mind any of current bollywood actress to play the female lead...
priyanka chopra.. sneha ullal..any1 wud do..

Anonymous said...

@Sid: Sure, actually as I just told somebody recently, I am going to be next Karan Johar. (the rona-dhona would also nicely fit there)

Now that I have two movies to direct before I started, I am sure to laugh all the way to the bank to deposit all those dollars.

P.S. The other movie is called "Kanpur ki Kanya" on the insistance of the person on whose plight it is based ;)


@Chilled LJ: Got any ideas as to who the producer can be? (Take that as a hint)

Cuckoo said...

Fleiger & SiD,
Now it's between you two. I am clearly & cleverly out of this business.

Anonymous said...

Not fair LJ... now we will have to search for a producer.

Prashanth M said...

ROTFL... haha... how come you were not aware of 'pakaana'??!!

And to answer your question - how I came here?- flew from Mridula'a Travel tales :)

Cuckoo said...

Prashanth,
Welcome once again, hope you are enjoying my blog. Keep coming & enjoying. :))
Yes, being a pakka Delhite I didn't know that 'pakaana' is an integral part of Mumbai's vocab.. that too among educated cultured people.