My Firsts..

In this series, I will not speak about my first step or my first word… those topics are exclusively reserved for my mother.
Here, these posts, are about the things that I have experienced and remember. They will appear in my blog as and when I experience or remember them, not in any sequential mode.

First Post
First Tag
First Hindi Poem
First Logic
First English Poem
First Dream
First Trip Abroad

Current song- Malgudi Days .. Tanana na.. ...

Are we safe?

Today I happened to go to passport office in Worli. It is situated in Bengal Chemicals building and looked a pretty new office. There are two main halls, one each on either side. Both the halls were packed to full capacity.

At the entrance, I was asked by the security why I want to go in. I just had to utter one word “passport” and he let me in without further enquiry or checking. With a small rucksack on my back, one large plastic bag and a handbag I entered. Near the Xerox counter two public telephones are kept. Since no one was using the telephones (probably they were out of order) I kept my bags on the counter and stood in the nearest queue. After around 45 minutes I thought of taking one round to give some exercise to my legs. My bags were still there on the counter within my sight. I was in that hall for more than three hours in total before moving to the other hall and to my surprise no one was bothered about those unclaimed bags lying on the counter.

Last weekend, I saw two French movies from the French festival at Fun Republic. Fun Republic is a mall and has mini theatres, a gaming arcade and a bowling alley, a Macdonald among other outlets. First day we were a little late (thanks to Mumbai traffic) so had to rush directly to the movie floor from basement car parking area. Showed our tickets at the entrance of cinema and we were inside the picture hall.

Next day we reached early, parked the car and instead of going up the movie floor, came to the other side of the building. At the door there was a security guard who didn’t bother to even look at us since we were coming out of the building. We played bowling for sometime, had snacks before re-entering into the building for movie through the same entrance from where we had come out. Now this time there was a lady security guard also and she casually checked my handbag (not me). There is no such checking if we enter the building from parking lot side. When I pointed this out to them, they just ignored it saying, “Check to kar rahen hain, aur kya karen?”.

Question - After so many cases of bomb blasts, are we safe?

Current song- Agar Tum Mil Jao, Zamana Chhod Denge Hum – Udit

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – III

Before I narrate this final part, my humble request to all dear readers to actively comment and discuss on this 3 part series. I would like to know about my understanding & interpretation of the local vocab in particular and also about the post in general. The second part will help me in improving the quality of posts. What you liked or disliked about these posts. Feel free to voice your opinions as many times as you wish. I value your opinion. Please spend some time, do it at leisure, and DO it. Thanks.

First, let us have a free ride of Part – I and Part – II. FREEEEEEE?? Me comingggggg..

Ah! That was quite a ride ;)) Isn’t it?

So this boring dull story comes to an end with this equally boring post and even more boring Lady Jasoos. So sad na? Ok, before we get emotional, let me continue and finish it fast. So, me, the Lady Jasoos had full doubts about this ‘Udi’ man’s intentions.

Nevertheless, my one eyebrow went up and my CPU?? Huh, never mind. It was spinning at 1000000 RPM (excuse me non-IT people).. hmm hmm

Udi, Udi, Udi..

Did that mean he knew flying?? But this hefty guy was nowhere near any superman category. But who knows? NO, NO, NO.. I am NOT opening my mouth this time. Come what may.

Anyways, I was happy to have one more addition to my vocabulary.

Two good looking ;) guys were chatting with me (Ahem! For a change Lady Jasoos was happy) and suddenly one of them looking in one direction said, “Oh, my PL (Project Leader (for non-IT people)) is coming this way. Aaj to meri Vaat hai”.

Vaat ??? What?? Vaat = What??..

Some people’s pronunciation is sooo bad, let alone the grammar part. Don’t know from which remote place they do their studies. And who tells them to join this industry when they can’t even make a proper sentence? Now, what sense does his sentence make “Today is my what?”. Stoooopid guys.

My big grin had turned into an even bigger grrrrrr and while I was still trying to make sense out of that Vaat thing, and then.. .. then as in series of bomb blasts, the other guy dropped another one. “Chal beta kalti mar le”.

Kalti??? Oh no, not again!!! Was about to scream “Mommyyyyyyyyyy”. My gray cells had started turning black and my face red. The chilled Lady Jasoos was turning into a grilled one.

By now, I had started cursing myself for deciding to shift to Mumbai. I could manage in some languages but these stupid silly things were driving me crazy. Oh la la..

During lunch hour one day all of us wanted to have ice-cream. I looked at the menu. Ahaa !! There it is something new, “Sitaphal” ice-cream. Always ready to try out new things, I ordered the same wondering how it would be. First bite – Ummm delicious but didn’t have the taste what I was expecting. Second bite- I tried hard again to have the flavour of “Sitaphal” but no, it tasted altogether different to me.

Not wanting to make a fool of myself, summoned the waiter asking him what had he brought for me. “Sitaphal icecream, Madam” prompt came the reply. Girl sitting next to me tasted one bite of it and confirmed. I was not ready to believe that my taste buddies had divorced me in the prime of my youth. I’ve had green-peas ki barfi, cauliflower kheer, gajar halwa in the past and they had not given any strain to my taste-buddies, then why this stupid Sitaphal ice-cream? NOW, I said to myself, is the time to break the promise. Tried asking in a different way “How big a Sitaphal have you seen?”, “How do you normally eat a Sitaphal?” etc etc. I could see question marks on their faces but I had to find it out for the sake of my sanity.
According to them, Sitaphal was a fruit, but for me it was a vegetable. Uh uh, these guys were making mistake, didn’t know the difference between a fruit & a veggie- calling pumpkin a fruit !! PUMPKIN ??? They all jumped & shouted in unison “It’s Custard Apple”. It was my turn now to fall off the chair. :((

Many rhyming words like jhakaas, Bindaas are making me Khallaas (ohhhhh that one rhymed;)).. while loads of other words like raapchik, bhangar, yeda are still meaningless to me. I dare not to open my mouth lest..

I know one of ‘Parvarna’ & ‘waaparna’ means unaffordable but which one is that, I am at a loss. Similarly difference between ‘koodi’ & ‘udi’.. aaj tak samajh nahi aaya. If one is jump then what’s the other? And in what context do we use them?

It took me some months to understand that Aai shapath = Maa kasam (I still think so, someone please correct me if I am wrong) and Haaila, which I thought is an acronym of Haye Allah is NOT always used only by our Muslim brothers.

Anyways, I am an optimist, a keen observer, and a fast learner with ‘Never Say Die’ attitude. Looking at my alacrity, I am sure very soon I’ll master them all. :))

P.S. My Marathi is even better. ;) pan tikde ek problem aahe..

I request my fellow Marathi speaking friends to correct me if I go wrong somewhere. Mee tumchi aabhaari rehnaar.

Glossary of words used in this series: Some of them I picked up in office, others from day-to-day life.

Ghaai = Jaldi as in Jaldi hai kya? => Ghaai hai kya?
Gardi = Bheed (Hindi) = crowded
Ghadi = fold
Pakaana = bore karna
Udi = either jump or hop
Koodi = either jump or hop depending on Udi
Vaat = Shaamat (Hindi) as in aaj meri shaamat hai => aaj meri vaat hai
Kalti marna = something like (patli gali se nikalna) in Hindi
Sitaphal = custard apple = pumpkin (north India)
In Mumbai pumpkin is bhopla and that confuses me with zhopla (sleeping). Oh Oh too many rhymings. ;) I wonder what “bhopla zhopla” means? Pumpkin sleeping? ;) oh oh atta mee zhopli :P

Nakki = pakka (Hindi) = sure (English)
Kalingar = Tarbooz (hindi) = water melon.. this was a tough one for me. For months people were quoting kalingar in jokes and I was dumbfounded.
‘Parvarna’ & ‘waaparna’ = one of them is unaffordable, for other I am at a loss.
Haaila = Haye Allah (my guess)
Aai shapath = I swear = Maa kasam (My great logic.. since aai = mother, shapath=kasam/ swearword)
Mama = Thulla (north indian Hindi) = traffic policeman (English)

Current song- Lagi Tumse Man ki Lagan - Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – II

Whether you have read it or not, please read Part – I before reading this post for better continuity (or just for the heck of it ;)). I promise, I won’t proceed further till you finish. Waiting here for you.

Ok, done? Thanks. :))

So, the story goes like this. Once upon a time, there was a pretty little birdie named Cuckoo who shifted her nest to Mumbai..

Suddenly there was a tight slap on my face. “Oh come on, tell us the part II. Not interested in your boring story”.

Ouch!! Who did it? Huh? :((

Ok, so my self-made dictionary was swelling in size day by day. Some of these instances made me sit and think if I really was that bright? And as always, I was forced to have big bright grin on my face. I was learning new things. Yippeee…

But at other times I felt let down. Let down, because I FELT, by now some people had become aware of my knowledge of local vocab and at times they purposefully changed the conversation into their Hindi when they saw me coming their way. Just to have fun at my expense, I presume?? Grrrr..

This made me more quiet and observant all the time. I was almost tight-lipped. Though I wanted to shake the hand(s) of friendship offered by them, most of the time I ended up suspecting them for forming some conspiracies against me (purely my assumption). And so, a “Lady Jasoos” was born.

Once I even tried to tiptoe (with ears all up, eyes as sharp as an eagle) to their territory just to find out if they speak normally like that or only when they see me. But no luck :((

When I was new to my office, all my male colleagues were competing hard (of course, with all their good intentions), to impress me by helping in every little thing, even when I didn’t want any. How and what all they did over the period of time will NOT come in this post. Sorry.

Ok, let us come to the point.

On a particular day during break, some of them gathered around me, pulling each other’s leg in an attempt to have my full attention. One guy told me pointing to another “Ye bahut pakaata hai”.

“Oh, good. What all do you cook?” was my spontaneous question (with a big smile) to that other guy. There was a pin drop silence for 1.00000438 seconds and then to my utter surprise, everybody burst into non-stop laughter (literally ROFLing), so much so that some had tears in their eyes, and others, hot coffee on their clothes and all over the carpet. Now what??? Was there any hidden joke? I was utterly confused.

Enough is enough !! I am NOT (in CAPS, Bold, Underlined & bigger font size) going to open my mouth till I am dead sure of the meaning, I pledged to myself. These stooopid guys, what do they think of themselves?? Huh? Why do they do this to me?

I was terribly disturbed, always in deep thoughts, juggling with new wordology.

On another day, I overheard someone talking about potholes and suddenly changing to Hindi “Main udi maarke aaya”. Urghhh!! Another challenge?? Do these guys do it purposely, to check the depth my knowledge? Why do they have to speak near me? Did I see him slyly looking at me from the corner of his eye and smiling? The Lady Jasoos had full doubts about his intentions.

To be continued….

Current song- Dream Girl, kisi Shayar ki Ghazal.. Dream Girl – Kishore

Big Thanks !

On 14th July this year, when I wrote my first post in this blogworld, I never expected my blog to cross even 100 reads in the first year. Today, two and half months later, on 30th September it has more than 1000 reads, 1027 to be precise at this moment. My site meter shows right now there are two people online – one from Hyderabad, India & the other is from Glendale, Arizona.

My heartfelt thanks to all of you who have visited this blog, sometimes accidentally ;) and sometimes by referral. It gives a nice feeling and I am encouraged to write more on seeing such an overwhelming response from the people, none of whom I know personally.

Current song- Pour que tu m’aimes encore – Celine Dion

CRY Man, CRY !!

Is it right if men cry sometimes? That too in public? Yes, I am asking you.

After all, they are also human beings with all the same emotions as we women have. Then?? Then what’s wrong? Then where, what and why is the difference? What is keeping them to withhold their emotions?

Millions of times I must have heard this being told to opposite sex irrespective of his age “Hey, you should not cry, you are a man”.

While males and females have the same emotional capacity, they are taught very different lessons about how to handle their emotions. As we approach school age, all of us are made aware, "Big boys don't cry." And we small girls also start believing that, many times telling our “boy” friends how they should behave. Furthermore, we never see our dads and big brothers whimper every now and then.

Right from the beginning from his very early days in life, the male kid is being brainwashed of being a male. All people around him teach him only one lesson.

You are a boy, going to become a man..a strong man. You are NOT supposed to cry or weep or even show your emotions in public.

To enforce that embargo, those who couldn't hold back the tears had to endure the humiliation of being called a "girl”, a "sissy".

But where do the tears go? Where do all these emotions go? Sorry to say, they don’t disappear. They are still there, causing havoc. Is it because these men have held it in so long to believe that if they cry the tears won't stop? Perhaps the men just cry on the inside.

But why???

It really beats me. Look at this helpless, powerless, weak, self-emoting man. Why can’t this father moan openly at the sight of his son’s dead body? Is he not human or doesn’t he possess any emotions? Why are we after him to hide his true self? Why can’t he be normal?

Now, look at this famous picture of a young man during Gujarat riots.
With folded hands, crying profusely begging for his life. Do you think he was doing something terrifically wrong which he shouldn’t have done?

Emotions are to be felt, not acted on. As long as they are suppressed, we are tense and flustered. Most emphatically, suppressed emotions interfere with clear thinking. Ironically, in trying to control their emotions, most men wind up controlled by them.

If you happen to know cricket, do you remember Kapil Dev crying on TV when he was responding to the allegations of match fixing? That face of his is still fresh in my mind. I had also become tearful that time. When I can shed tears by just looking at the TV screen, why can’t he, who had gone through such pains, do that?

And again, recently in one of the talent search programs on ZEE TV, he almost cried.

What do you think of such fearless fast bowler of yesteryears? Or of all those firemen who broke down after rescuing people from the Twin Towers after 9/11 ??

But the truth is that a man feels trapped in an oppressive role that does not allow him the opportunity to freely express what he wants to. In other words, being a man has become very limiting and constrictive.

He is not suffering from a psychosexual compels, one of those women-trapped-in-men's-bodies syndromes. No. Nor is he homosexual or bisexual. Instead he is a man who wants the ability to express emotions and feelings as openly as the next woman.

The persistence of the emotionally alienated male addresses the political and social implications of male emotional release. Psychologists believe it is important to have a good cry. It is a proven fact that crying performs an important function by releasing stress hormones. And perhaps that is the reason why men are so angry, so restless and so helpless at times, a sheer psychological effect.

Anger is the most common emotion expressed by males. That is because men and boys feel more accepted by society when they express anger over what is considered to be the more ‘feminine’ emotions.

Why do so many men lose their tempers? The rage comes because there's so much frustration within. Yet that's what men do, the trap is worrying about what others will think - that it will lower their status or esteem. For men, the control of passions is the essence of masculinity and gentility. And that is the most pitiable picture today.

We all need to change it...change for better human emotions and understanding.

So guys, it is perfectly ok if you cry. Don’t hesitate. Open up, express yourself and CRY. No, nobody is going to laugh at you. We are here to comfort you, soothe you, understand you and LOVE you. We know that within your iron strong body there resides a tender & kind heart. We appreciate that very much. We are proud of you.

Now, I feel like giving you a big beary hug.

Current song- Dil Cheez Kya Hai, Aap Meri Jaan Leejiye – Asha Bhosale

Human Behaviour Society

Remakes Remade

Today saw the promotional clips of “Umrao Jaan” and “Don”, two much talked about remakes of the originals. My opinion? Both are going to be big flops. They might recover the money invested but no great hits.

Umrao Jaan- Agreed, Aishwariya Rai is extremely beautiful but she is no match to what Rekha was in original Umrao Jaan. I don’t have anything against Ash. She must have played her role with all honesty but I can’t think of anybody else close to the character of Umrao Jaan other than Rekha. The character of Umrao was of a dusky girl from a middle class family. I feel that Ash looks too regal to even look like that character, leave alone playing it.

Also, the evergreen songs sung by Asha Bhosale “Justjoo jiski ki thi, usko to na paaya humne”, “Dil cheez kya hai, aap meri jaan leejiye” and “In aankhon ki masti” are still so admired and full of emotions that they can’t be overlooked (heard) by new songs sung by Alka Yagnik. The magic of Asha Bhosale’s voice is missing completely.

Don- Though I am an out and out fan of SRK but sorry to say that this role doesn’t suit him at all. I am an ardent fan of Amitabh Bachchan also. The original Don had something so macho in his character.. the voice, the physique, the way he walked & talked.. The whole thing is missing from this remake.
I am not talking about the height or the voice only; the whole persona of Don is missing.

Poor SRK has to resort to other methods to mach that Don of yesteryears. Neither he has voice nor the height of senior AB to do justice to the role. Ok, ok, don’t say that even Godfather was of medium height but then he was THE Godfather with other adjectives attached to him.

Lots of close-ups of SRK in the movie to concentrate on his plus points to make him look like a Don e.g. SRK has to twist his fingers in a particular style while smoking/holding ciggie, show his angry eyes to give the scene an appeal or the way he puts on his sun-glasses etc. The director has tried hard by showing only SRK’s moving feet with supporting background music because the moment he’s shown in full, the very effect of being a Don goes away.

Again, the famous song “Ye mera Dil Pyar ka diwaana, Diwaana diwaana, yaar ka diwaana” sung by Asha Bhosale is filmed on Kareena & SRK. It looks horrible.

I don’t think this dialogue “Jeetna meri zid hi nahi, meri aadat hai” of this generation’s Don will save the film.

Again, nothing against new singers, new actors but remake of a good movie is just not right. Why do they have to spoil the charm created by originals?

Current song- Woh ho Kagaz ki kashti, Woh Baarish ka Pani – Jagjit Singh

Mulgi Shikli Pragati Zhali – I

When I shifted to Mumbai, little did I know I would be showered by such pleasant surprises on a day-to-day basis.

Right from its rains to local trains,

Missing zebra crossings to manners of road crossing,

Never ending road repairs to state of affairs

Life so vibrant, people so resilient

Ganpati Visarjan to Navratri Dandiyas,

The Hindi jargon to to to (Oh, forget it)... Oh, everything was so very different.

Wow ! It was going to be fun filled Mumbai for someone as remotely connected to it as me. I was enthralled by its powerfully diverse eloquence. Today I will talk about only one of those - the language… the Mumbaiya bhasha that has fascinated me immensely.

There are many instances, which made me look bamboozled. Here, I have jotted down some of them.

Well, to start with, even before coming to Mumbai, I was aware that some of the kitchen stuff / vegetables are called differently in Mumbai like Potato/onion are batata/kanda, salt is meeth. Egg would become baida and pyaaz ke pakode would be nicely replaced by kanda bajjiya’s …so far so good, I could deal with them easily on daily basis.

But hold on.... there was a lot more in store for me.

Once our maid forgot to bring her umbrella. “Subah subah ghaai mein bhool gayi”. Ghaai??? Or was it ghia? But then ghia also didn’t make any sense here. Ghia happens to be a vegetable in north India. How could she forget her umbrella in a vegetable? Maybe a slip of tongue. I gave some work to my ever-alert brains. Oh I see, all she wanted to say that she left it in a vegetable shop while buying ghia. I pat myself for having such a presence of mind.

One morning my colleague came panting to the office. “Train mein kitna Gardi tha aaj”. Gardi???

Darn!! Here comes another alien word for me. But I don’t give up so easily. Being an introvert, instead of asking him what is he talking about, I coaxed my smart brains to start working again.

Hmmm hmm hmm “Garmi” & “Sardi” are two weather conditions I know and maybe this “Gardi” was somewhere between them. I rolled my eyes with utmost joy. Yessss, I had guessed it right. So, they call it “Gardi”. How sweet of Mumbai people to think of such a lovely intermediate name.

Gardi = (Garmi + Sardi) + a touch of Humidi(ty).

My seventh sense reconfirmed my logic. Oh, if only I had applied my logical brains while programming, I would have got double promotions all the time (My eyes are now set for PM’s post).

Ok ok, come to the point now. So, that’s why this poor guy is panting so heavily. I smiled back to him “Yeah, aajkal bahot gardi hai, especially in this monsoon season”. He gave me a strange look, without uttering a word.

Nevertheless, I was amazingly surprised at my intelligence level and grasping power. I congratulated myself at the rate I was picking up the local vocab. My confidence level had reached a new height.

Recently, when employing the new maid, I did my two-bit to ask her a few questions. Confidently I asked “Kya-kya karogi?” Among other things, she made gesture of folding clothes and said “Kapde ka Ghadi lagake rakhegi”.

Ghadi??? Oh ok, she’d fold the clothes on time. Eh? What’s the big deal? She has to do it anyways on time or else why on earth are we paying her so much? Being a Sunday I was home and my mother thanked me for my presence at that moment; she couldn’t have handled this kind of interpretation alone. Brainy me. :))

To be continued…

Current song- Chookar Mere Man ko, Kiya Tune Kya Ishara – Kishore

Coma

Finished reading ‘Coma’ by Robin Cook. A classic medical thriller. Always wanted to read this book since the day I saw the movie based on this novel. Those who are familiar with medical background or hospital scenes will definitely enjoy this piece of reading.

It’s about a girl; a third year medical student, who suddenly comes across two comatose cases and against all odds, tries to find out the real cause. Why some young people who come to the famous hospital for minor surgeries go into coma with no known cause and such cases are on the rise. The whole anecdote finishes in just four days. Sounds interesting? Read the book. :)

Current song- Nishana Tula Disla Na – Suresh Wadkar
Books

Work Definition

I work hard and my boss hardly works.

Current song- Jiya Na Jaaye Tere Bin Saathiya – Faakhir
Humour

Different Stages in a Female’s Life

- A foetus was aborted because it was a “she”

- A newborn female buried alive by her own mother

- An eleven-year-old girl mortgaged for Rs 5000/- by her father to pay off the debts

- A fifteen-year-old gang raped in moving car.

- Two school girls lured into flesh market in Kolkata

- A college teenager raped by a policeman in a police-chowky in broad daylight

- A maid was killed by her employer after getting impregnated by him.

- A housewife burnt alive for want of more dowry

- A 35 year old woman thrown out of the house for not bearing a male child

- A 65 year old woman was killed by her son for a paltry sum

Even after knowing how difficult it is to survive and live a long fruitful life with dignity, I am proud to be a female and would want to be born as female again and again and again...

Current song- Tum Itna Jo Muskura Rahe ho, Kya Gham Hai Jisko Chupa Rahe Ho
Society

Tight from Loose

Last Sunday afternoon while traveling on local train I heard some gossip going on in front seat. First class, opposite direction of traffic…I could hear all. They caught my attention when I heard something about Beckham & his wife Posh.

This is what I heard.

First passenger - Posh is no good. I don’t like her. She is wafer thin without any curves yaar.

Second passenger – No wonder, why Beckham always wanted a tight hug from Loose (Rebecca).

Current song- Aankhen bhi hoti hain dil ki zubaan
Humour

Bravo Alcohol Lady !

Jyoti Deshmukh of Nashik took to her hands when it came to alcohol. Her husband was an alcoholic who used to come home drunk everyday and abuse her mentally, physically in front of her two little girls. A year back, when it went beyond her tolerance level, the tortures and the pains, she decided to stand up against it and started off by speaking to other ladies who had similar fates. Assembled all, they decided to do something about it - curb it from the root.

They contacted police and other related offices, distributed pamphlets, did everything they could. Slowly and slowly other people also joined in.

And today they don’t have a single alcohol shop in their area. The shops were forced to close down.

A small but powerful step. On teacher’s day I salute her. She has taught us an important lesson. Lage Raho Jyoti taai.

Current song- Priteech Jhul Jhul Pan

Society

My First Tag

So, I was tagged - tagged for the first time on my first visit to someone’s blog. Fleiger, The Great Eagle tagged me. Ufffffff.. Why did I visit his site? Galti se mistake ho gaya.

Anyways, I tried doing that…shuffle & play & think of each song as answer to those 15 questions. This is what I got...In blue are my instant reactions.

1.How does the world see you?

American Idiot - Green day

Oh no !! Who goofed up with my list? Of all the songs, this one had to come NOW??? But..but never mind, I am an Indian, it's not for me.

2.Will I have a happy life?

Kahe ko Roye, Safal hogi teri Aaradhana – Aaradhana

Heyyy Hello, excuse me. I am not worrying …ok?

3.What do my friends think of me as?

Dost Dost na Raha – Mukesh

So, the secret is out now ;)

4.Do people secretly lust after me?

Jadu Hai Nasha Hai- Jism

Huh??

5.How can I make myself happy?

Just Chill Chill Chill- MPKK

Ok, ok… No more questions on my happiness.

6.What should I do with my life?

Chappa Chappa Charkha Chale – Maachis

Now, is it a hint for me? Someone wants me to follow Gandhiji?

7.Will I ever have children?

Ek, do teen, char, paanch, che, saat, Aath, Nau, Dus, Gyareh – Tezaab

Bas, bas. Enough ! Believe me it's almost 8 hours since I played this musical game and unknowingly I am still staring at my tummy worrying..

8.What is some good advise for me?

Thodi Thodi Piya karo - Pankaj Udhaas

Now, THAT is a pretty good advice ;)… Amen..

9.How will I be remembered?

Bindu re Bindu - Padosan

Cuckoo re Cuckoo would have been better, I guess.

10.What's my signature dancing song?

Soniye, Tu Hi Tu hi Meri Manzil – Aksar

At last, something nice coming my way.. :)

11.What's my current theme song?

Rim Zhim gire Sawan, Sulag Sulag Jaaye Man

Arre, Baarish ke mausam me aur kya girega? On a serious note-something that I love… rains and this song.

12.What do others think is my current theme song?

Aaj Main Upar Aasman Neeche- Khamoshi

Matlab??? They are sending me to GOD abhi se?? Can’t they think of something better for me?

13.What shall they play at my funeral?

Where's the party tonight? – KANK

WHATTTTTTTTT???????? Now I know the meaning of “Aaj Main Upar, Aasman Neeche”

14.What type of men/women do I like?

Agar Tum Mil Jao Zamana Chhor Denge Hum – Zeher

Now, that's a commitment from my side… ;) but but but.. by looking at the response of Q12 & Q13, I am not very optimist. Abhi to Zamana mujhe chordne ki baat kar raha hai.

15.How's my love life?

Piya Tu Ab to Aaja - Asha & RD Burman

Do I need to comment on this?

Now, I am thinking of who should I tag. Hmmm let it be a surprise. And yes, no more tags for me puleeeeese.

Current song- Another Brick In The Wall – Pink Floyd

Humour Tags

To My Sarkar

Dear Government,

We, citizens of democratic India, request you to kindly let us choose what we want to watch on TV. Please don’t decide for us. We are matured, educated & sensible enough to make a decision in case we have children.

Think of young working couples who would want to rejuvenate themselves by watching some good nice programs in their cozy home after a tiring day.

Thanks,

A citizen of India

Note- An early decision to this highly unjust judgment is highly appreciated.

Current song- It’s my Life – Bon Jovi

Bald & Beautiful

Being unnaturally bald is in. Think of it. It keeps your head in shape (and in limelight as well !). No expense of comb, haircut, shampoo, various gels & dyes etc. No need to waste your precious time & hard earned money in hiding your beautiful container of intellectuals. No need for wet look, egg look is THE best look. ;)

And when you move hands over your recently shaved head, ahaaa what satisfaction it gives you!! You feel like a king, never wanting to remove your hands from your prized possession. And trust me, in your new look, you look very sexy and macho ;)

Why do you think some of the people like Mike Tyson, Michael Jordan, Ronaldo, Zinedine Zidane, Pritish Nandy and Aditya Panscholi always want to remain the baldy way? Shane Warne and David Beckham tried it as well. Recently Sreesanth, Irfan Pathan, Michael Ballack and now Vivek Raqsinha all followed the same path, just to experience the ultimate.

So, guys, it’s time for you to look & feel better (before you go naturally bald).

Current song- The only thing that looks good on me is you – Bryan Adams

Ye Baarishon ka Mausam

Rim jhim gire Sawan, sulag sulag jaaye man
Bheege aaj is mausam mein, lagi kaisi ye agan

Pehle bhi yu to barse the badal
Pehle bhi yu to bheega tha aanchal
Abke baras kyu sajan sulag sulag jaaye man
Bheege aaj is mausam mein, lagi kaisi ye agan

Is baar Sawan dehka hua hai
Is baar Mausam behka hua hai
Jaane peeke kare kya pawan sulag sulag jaaye man
Bheege aaj is mausam mein, lagi kaisi ye agan

Rains, rains Don’t go away.. I love you. You fascinate me, make me joyous, happy, cheerful and of course you make me feel utterly romantic. Every season when your first showers touch the naked soil, it smiles like a new sleeping bride being kissed and its fragrance.. Ummm I just love it. I like to get drenched. And when you splash your drops on my face… Ahaa! What a feeling!

You bring smiles on a farmer’s face; kids welcome you with paper boats. They play football when you are pouring. There is nothing more we all want. My way of welcoming you is getting mesmerized watching you for hours from my window with kanda bajjiya’s & hot tea at my side, some soft music, & light reading or jigsaw puzzles and when you sprinkle your little droplets on my face, I feel out of the world. :))

Current song- Rim Jhim Gire sawan, sulag sulag jaye man – Kishore

Somethings that I long to do one fine day ;)

People have numerous things on their mind what they want to do (with or without pun intended). I am no exception. Not that I am incompetent; I can do & achieve almost all of my so-called “dreams”, all of them are doable but somehow the golden opportunity has been evading me.

Though my entire list is quite long, following are a few things I would like to do NOW, Just now.

1. Traveling on a bael-gaadi (bullock-cart). If you happen to be in Delhi during night time on ring road, sometimes you can see hordes of such carts with long iron girders with red cloth & a lantern hanging at the end giving a warning sign. They move at such a slow speed that anyone who knows walking can overtake them. I have always wanted to go home on one of those.

2. Read a cheap roadside Hindi novel by an unknown author e.g. Jawani ki raaten, Khoon bhari dastaan. Out of curiosity, I just want to know what is there in these novels that makes them saleable and hot property & why so many people in India still buy, read and enjoy them? So then, why can’t I be one of them ;) at least for a day?

3. Sleep on a beach (clean beach ofcourse!! :)) in a moonlit night. Yes, I want to sleep one day ooops sorry one night on a lonely beach staring at the stars, listening to the waves, lost in my own thoughts but no dogs around me please. I am aware it’s extremely difficult task to be alone, especially in India, considering my friendly neighbours like crabs, snails, dogs and some “manly” creatures who would want to give me unwanted company all the time. I can imagine the morning after, but still I want to do it. It’s in my wishlist. ;)

4. Meet a criminal. Yeah, I want to meet, shake hands, speak and spend a day with a hardcore & notorious criminal in his cell, again out of curiosity. I want to see them closely. Want to analyze their minds. Want to share their pains or whatever they call it. Even to think of it, it has already started giving me goose bumps but I think I can manage it with my head held high (If it remains attached to my shoulder after meeting him).

5. Sing on a crowded road in rains. Rains fascinate me and I want to sing loudly when it’s raining heavily (read pouring) during peak evening hours, and create a traffic jam. And there’s no better place than Mumbai to carry out this lovely activity. The roads I have short listed are S V Road, Andheri-chakala/saki naka, Milan subway, Gandhi Nagar crossing which are always under construction and full of lovely pot holes. I don’t give a damn to the policeman standing there or people shouting at me. I just want to do it once.

Current song- Ek Ladki Bheegi Bhaagi Si, Soti Raton Mein Jaagi Si – Kishore

Dreams Self

What If...

A few days back there was a news about a man smuggling 6 eggs (of rare species) out of Australia to surprise his girlfriend in Bangkok. He had hidden the eggs in his underwear. Just one curious thought, what if the eggs had hatched there??? ;) Errr.. just a thought. Ok? Damn with my innocent wicked top floor. ;)

Current song- Chand Sifarish jo karta hamari – Shaan
Humour

The Life After

There was blockage of several sites including our favourite Blogspot for nearly 8 days under so-called directive of Ministry of Communication or IT ministry or whatever. Every single person who was involved with blog world in any way was annoyed, angered & saddened. It looked like we were living in countries like Iran, China etc. It was a blow to our freedom of speech & expression in a free, democratic country like India. What was that, Internet censorship or censorship on freedom of expression? We still don’t know.

But then it was somewhat needed in the wake of blasts. The GOI wanted to curtail the culprits. I agree with them but they should have used other more specific, simpler methods instead of harassing (bugging) the blogging public this way.

And poor little me?? Well, I had just thought of talking aloud, had posted my first ever post on web and to my utter surprise I couldn’t even see how my blog looked like!!! My first impression was that I had not posted it correctly cursing myself on being so dumb; the second was that the site is under maintenance. This was a little bit relaxing compared to the first one. ;) Immediately after posting my first post, I received a comment from a certain anonymous (Godsend?) whose comments are the sole ones till date. Long Live Anonymous for encouraging me!!

Next day I posted one more, still could not see anything. How could the site be under maintenance for more than 24 hours, that too without any news from their side? My posts were getting successfully published! But what was the use if I was not able to see them let alone the world! I was getting a little frantic. Went to Blogger’s Help, came to know there were hundreds like me. I was relaxed. :) I was not alone. Just for the heck of it, I posted a one-liner on the third day again. One person from the blogger’s help group said he could see my blog sitting in Delhi. I envied him.

I decided not to post anything till the issue gets resolved.

And today I have started posting again.

Current song- Asava Sundar Chockletcha Bungla – Cute little angels